I Don't Know Anything

Field Trip | No.32

Field Trip is a newsletter exploring life through the lens of a designer. Mostly essays, notes and things of interest found along the way.

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I started this newsletter a year ago to the day and despite wrestling with it constantly, I’m glad I started it and I’m glad it’s still going. As a serial instagram archiver, I’m honestly surprised I haven’t deleted every post already. Field Trip’s taken a few turns but ultimately remains a place of research and discovery in a design sense (as intended) but also in life generally (a happy accident?). Writing’s become a way for me to work through thoughts, process things and let go of my incessant need to be evasive and guarded at all times.

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Wtf do I know?

After a year of writing I still don’t feel particularly good at it and often question why I write when I regularly feel like I don’t know anything. I almost didn’t write this post because I didn’t feel like I had much to give this week. Self-doubt continually makes me question why people seem to care about what I have to say when I feel like I need to add “but wtf do I know?” disclaimers to the end of every post I write.

The more I learn about design, the more overwhelmed I feel by it. The more books I read then try to write about, the more I second guess my interpretation of them. Last February I was desperate to get out of my hometown and live alone somewhere new; I’m now doing exactly that, but feel the same despondency I did a year ago. The more things I experience, the less I know what I want. And the more I feel like I have no right to offer advice, recommend things or write as if I know what the hell I’m talking about.

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So what’s the point?

I think the point is just to do it anyway. I don’t know what I’m doing, but I’m doing it. It’s worth putting things out into the world and inviting people into your life and being vulnerable. When the self-doubt creeps in I think about the articles and books I wouldn’t get to read if my favourite writers stopped writing. I think about the songs and albums I wouldn’t have to depend on if my favourite musicians thought no one cared. I don’t know much at all, but I do know it’s all worth doing. If Field Trip can offer some kind of comfort or inspiration for even a second, I’m proud it exists.

I really hope if you’re sitting on an idea or thinking of doing something, you do it. The fulfilment from doing stuff and putting it out there far outweighs the feelings of self-doubt. There really is no reason to not do everything you want.

But wtf do I know?

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Things of Interest

🎧 How To Drive by Alexander 23

🎧 The People’s Champ by Quinn XCII

🎧 The Record by Boygenius